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The Stepmom Shower Celebrates Your Girlfriend’s Brave New World

Big life events call for big celebrations, and who better to celebrate with than our girlfriends? Women are well-versed at celebrating milestones. Most of us can throw a baby shower or plan a wedding shower with our eyes closed. But when life throws you a curve, you need a new twist on the traditional girlfriend celebrations. For example: The Stepmom Shower! Izzy Rose, author of The Package Deal: My (not-so) Glamorous Transition from Single Gal to Instant Mom shares how to throw one in this post, written especially for GirlfriendCelebrations. Izzy’s not a wicked stepmother, but she does have a wicked sense of humor, so enjoy, girlfriends!

by Izzy Rose

Single gals—have you noticed that the dating pool has changed recently? There’s a new ripple in it: Many of the eligible bachelors out there are hardly single. They come with small versions of themselves and an ex-wife! If you have a girlfriend who has recently taken the marital plunge and surfaced with a man plus kids, celebrate this life transition by throwing her a Stepmom Shower: an afternoon of girlfriend adoration and indulgence! Unlike the traditional baby shower where mama-to-be receives gifts for the survival of the newborn, the stepmom shower honors the grown woman, similarly thrust into an unknown world, just as naïve and in need of care. Because our girlfriends know best how to comfort us in times of uncertainty and stress, the Stepmom Shower celebrates female friendship, good humor and applauds the bravery required to plug into a family that existed long before you came along.

The setting

The “celebrated” shows up to the location of her choosing (shooting range, ice arena, wine bar, poolside cabana) in her wedding dress. (I don’t know about you, but I’ve just been waiting for an excuse to put on my Cinderella gown on again.) All attending ladies are asked to wear a retired bridesmaid dress.

Food and drink

What your girlfriend needs is some good, old-fashioned nurturing … not a low calorie meal! I suggest you ditch the healthy crudités, bust out the butter cookies and turn on the martini fountain.

The gifts

Give her something she will really appreciate, and use. A single gal turned insta-mom to half-grown kids has no need for bum powder and babydoll socks. If your girlfriend is going to survive stepmotherhood, she must remember to take care of herself. Here are a few of my favorite stepmom shower gifts:

A case (or box) of wine

1 pound of French cheese (crackers included)

90-minute massage

Xanax sampler pack

New lipsticks


It wouldn’t be a shower without a competitive game, now would it? Since all of you will be in wedding attire that screams to be shown off, create a makeshift runway in the house (long hallways are perfect), turn on Gloria Gaynor’s “I will Survive,” and take turns walking the runway of America’s Next Top Mama.

The guest of honor will judge all participants and choose one winner based on the following criteria:
Attitude (Turn up the sass!)

Design (Ruffles, bows and lace! Who combines them all?)

Color (Go bold! Turquoise and electric pink are guaranteed crowd-pleasers.)

For a prize, consider a copy of my book, The Package Deal: My (not-so) Glamorous Transition from Single Gal to Instant Mom.

Izzy Rose is the author of The Package Deal: My (not-so) Glamorous Transition from Single Gal to Instant Mom, and is the founder of, a humorous blog and resource site for the modern-day stepmom. She lives in Austin, Texas with her husband and his two sons. Read the rest of this entry »

Reader Request: 50th Birthday Thoughts!

The 50th birthday is pivotal in a woman’s life. And, judging from the mail we receive, it is not just a milestone that means we’re approaching midlife. Something about hitting the 50 mark also makes us feel reflective, appreciative, and generous toward our female friends! Our reader Erin wrote to us recently seeking input on her upcoming 50th Birthday Celebration. We’ve rounded up some tips for her, which you can read after the jump. But we’d also love to hear from you, and we’re sure Erin would as well. What makes a 50th birthday celebration great?

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NOT a Baby Shower!

No, it was *not* a baby shower. Just a little luncheon for our girlfriend Siobhainn, pregnant with her 3rd. She adamantly refused a baby shower, but that didn’t stop us from pampering her in other ways! Readers often ask us for non-traditional baby shower ideas, and our Birth Day Party article provides a great shower focused on the mama-to-be.

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Friends to the End…

Hello, girlfriends! We just received a very touching comment from our reader Helen Werme, and we’d like your help in responding to her:”…Our girl friend passed away and I wondered if any of you have ever had a celebration of life? Our friend has only seven of us Red Hat Ladies and we are planning to rent a pontoon boat and take her ashes and her husband’s and pet’s ashes out to sea as she wished. That is fine but what else could you suggest we do? We have written a poem and have a frame with pictures of our events with her, but need something more. Thanks for your help if you have any suggestions. –Queen Mom Helen”

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Celebrate Birth Day — With A Unique Baby Shower

So, you’re not hip on traditional baby showers, but still want to plan something special for your girlfriend who’s expecting? Why not plan a Birth Day Party–a shower designed around the needs of your friend and the day of delivery. This party is ideal for mothers who aren’t having their first child, or who have already had a traditional shower. It’s also perfect for those who can’t stand the thought of one more silly baby shower game. By turning the focus on the new mother, you can add comfort to her days and nurture her with loving support. Here’s how:

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